How Rejection Sensitivity Affects Women with ADHD

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects how your brain develops. It can cause issues with: 

• Paying attention to details 
• Controlling impulses 
• Regulating emotions 
• Staying organized
• Completing daily tasks 

Women usually have fewer of the hyperactive symptoms often associated with ADHD. If you’re a woman living with ADHD, you may struggle with more inattentive symptoms, such as difficulties finishing tasks, extreme forgetfulness, emotional dysregulation, and impaired executive function. 

In some cases, an impaired level of executive functioning and inability to regulate emotions can lead to taking ambiguous social cues personally and misreading the emotions or intentions of others as criticism. 

As a result, it can prompt an emotional reaction disproportionate to the situation, which is called rejection sensitivity. 

Rejection sensitivity is associated with several mental health disorders, such as anxiety and depression, and it’s especially common with ADHD. 

If you’re a woman living with ADHD, you may find that many things in your life trigger intense feelings of failure and rejection that are challenging to ignore and work through. 

At RapidRecovery TMS in Wilmington, North Carolina, our team understands how hard it can be to manage the emotional dysregulation that comes with ADHD. 

So, in this month’s blog, we discuss what rejection sensitivity is and why it often develops in women with ADHD. 

Understanding rejection sensitivity 

No one enjoys being rejected, criticized, or feeling like they’ve failed. However, when you have rejection sensitivity, any real or perceived rejection or disapproval can cause intense and devastating emotional pain. This pain can be internalized and mimic a severe mood disorder with suicidal ideation or be externalized and present as instantaneous rage.

When you have high rejection sensitivity, you may constantly anticipate rejection and regularly misinterpret facial expressions, body language, and written or verbal communication as disapproval. You may be so fearful of public humiliation or being criticized by people close to you.

With rejection sensitivity, you may:

• Feel easily embarrassed or self-conscious
• Constantly seek reassurance
• Be a strong people-pleaser or perfectionist
• Have low self-esteem
• Avoid projects when there’s any chance of failure
• Misread a delayed response as a rejection

Rejection sensitivity and ADHD

Because rejection is difficult to measure, rejection sensitivity isn’t an actual diagnosis or part of the ADHD screening process. However, this emotional state is often seen in those who have ADHD. 

When you have ADHD, your brain’s frontal lobe – the area that controls attention, language, impulse control, social skills, and problem-solving – works differently. This can make it easy for you to miss social cues or misinterpret vague conversations as forms of rejection or criticism. 

As a result, you can have strong feelings of betrayal, confusion, and failure that are challenging to regulate. 

Why are women with ADHD so affected by rejection sensitivity?

Girls with ADHD can often find it difficult to regulate emotions and understand social cues. This sensitivity, emotional dysregulation, and confusion can come with feelings of rejection and misunderstanding from others. 

As a result, girls with ADHD can start to expect rejection and criticism as they try to fit into and follow societal norms. 

As you grow and become a woman with ADHD, these repeated episodes of rejection can alter your brain chemistry, increasing the amount of adrenaline and cortisol your brain produces and making you vulnerable to developing rejection sensitivity. 

The more you try to become what you think society expects of you, the more emotionally exhausted and anxious you become, fearing that others will find out you’re an imposter and reject you. This intense fear and anxiety makes any perceived rejection feel like your world is ending.

Learning how to navigate rejection sensitivity

If rejection sensitivity has made it difficult to maintain healthy relationships with others, talking with a trusted professional and learning productive coping mechanisms can be helpful. 

To get started with effective ADHD management strategies, schedule a consultation with our RapidRecovery TMS team by calling our office or using our online booking feature today.